I wish Aven could stay. I want my baby more than words can say. I wish she would survive and live and that God would heal her. I believe in God, that He is our Heavenly Father, that He has all power and can do all things. He is a God of miracles and I know that if it was His will He could heal Aven or make it so we could have her for a lifetime here on earth. But I also know, believe, have faith that sometimes God's will and His plan for us is different than what we would want for ourselves.
He has a different plan in mind sometimes and we need to have faith in Him and know that He knows us and loves us more than we can comprehend. He knows what we need and even though it is very hard to describe how I feel at the thought of losing my baby. I am heart broken and it hurts and I ache. It is almost unbearable knowing that at the end I might leave the hospital with no baby in my arms and with no sister to bring home to Luke, Lynnea, and Lincoln. No baby to nurture and care for and watch grow. Yet I have faith, that believing in something I can't see, that this is Heavenly Father’s Plan for me, for our baby, and for our family.
I know that this baby has a beautiful, special, perfect spirit - one that was never meant for this world. Heavenly Father has a different plan for this baby. And perhaps, although I don’t know why, she chose to come to our family to have David and I provide a body so that she could go back to Heavenly Father’s presence and be with Him. I know that He will heal her and she will be perfect inside and out, but it might have to wait until she is in Heaven.
David picked Aven's middle name to be Hope.
In our church we believe that:
"Hope is the confident expectation of and longing for the promised blessings of righteousness. The scriptures often speak of hope as anticipation of eternal life through faith in Jesus Christ.
The word hope is sometimes misunderstood. In our everyday language, the word often has a hint of uncertainty. For example, we may say that we hope for a change in the weather or a visit from a friend. In the language of the gospel, however, the word hope is sure, unwavering, and active. Prophets speak of having a “firm hope” (Alma 34:41) and a “lively hope” (1 Peter 1:3). The prophet Moroni taught, “Whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God” (Ether 12:4).
When we have hope, we trust God's promises. We have a quiet assurance that if we do “the works of righteousness,” we “shall receive [our] reward, even peace in this world, and eternal life in the world to come” (D&C 59:23). Mormon taught that such hope comes only through the Atonement of Jesus Christ: “What is it that ye shall hope for? Behold I say unto you that ye shall have hope through the atonement of Christ and the power of his resurrection, to be raised unto life eternal, and this because of your faith in him according to the promise” (Moroni 7:41).
... The principle of hope extends into the eternities, but it also can sustain us through the everyday challenges of life. “Happy is he,” said the Psalmist, “that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the Lord his God” (Psalm 146:5). With hope, we can find joy in life. We can “have patience, and bear with . . . afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions” (Alma 34:41). We can “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life” (2 Nephi 31:20).
https://www.lds.org/topics/hope?lang=eng
Aven's middle name is Hope because of this and many other reasons which we might discover in the days, weeks, and years to come.
I believe with all my heart that if it is God's will and in His plan for us that Aven will not be able to survive that I will see her again and I have the "Hope" that she and all of us will have eternal life through our Savior Jesus Christ. We will all be together again.
No comments:
Post a Comment